Well, I missed one post. The beginning of the end you say, nay readers, I have just had a massively busy week. The image above represents what I would prefer busy to look like. I did a seminar of Systema in Italy which was well received and then I have spent more time in government offices than I ever care to so as to sort out various official papers to do with my wedding, passport renewal for Readhead Girl with her new name and various other odds and ends. None of which is very exciting either really. The systema week-end was the highlight as it also involved a little beach time and a swim in warm waters. We may also have some video from it that was not completely bad, but it’s all in Italian, so we’ll see if I got anything good on it.
Other than that, it’s back to a post every Monday morning from now on. As for the results of your survey from a few days ago (see previous post) it’s quite interesting. The two or three things we can tentaively say based on your answers are:
1. People do not want to be dishonest in general. Cheating on the significant other is obviously done out of necessity and some need not being fulfilled by the relationship.
2. Possibly surprising, if one’s partner does not object to your sleeping around but they will not do it themselves, most people seem to think this would not per se result in their sleeping around any more or less, again, reinforcing the idea that most people would prefer to be honest about what they really want.
3. The majority of people would prefer to have sex with others too or at least have that option open to them at some point (no surprises there) but ideally they would want to do so without
feeling bad about it it would seem. Also, if global divorce and adultery statistics are anything to go by, a sizeable portion of you people are deluding yourselves that you “would never do such a thing”. About 15-20% or so more people (statistically) would actually fall in the “at some point I would/might/want to” than actually answered in any one of those combinations. Also, if everyone could just be honest without anyone making them feel bad about it, it seems everyone would be doing everyone. Welcome to the modern Roman Orgy. Once you take into account the self-delusion portion it seems only about 10% of people actually would seem to want purely monogamous relationships. This assumes the best possible numbers (on average) for all the answers given when compared to other global surveys on adultery.
In other words, the only thing we can say with some degree of certainty by the responses we have so far is that the human ability to self-deceive is alive and well. More importantly though, so is the fear of being judged for our thoughts/wishes and desires. Keep your responses coming and don’t be shy to invite friends to take part. The more people answer the questions over time, the better the final picture will be as a result of larger numbers being able to give a possibly better idea of the main views.
I am toying with the idea of having a fun or sexy survey every week, but we will see how things go. I also realised from this survey that it’s important to consider not just what questions to ask, but how to ask them and how to interpret them in relation to other answers. keep in mind all your replies are completely anonymous, i have no way of knowing who answered what (though some of you e-mailed me to tell me….you exhibitionists you!)
Have a great week.