Archive for the ‘Humour’ Category

This man is my new hero. I say vote HIM into office!


Hilarious and Oh so true too. Click the link below for one of the coolest videos ever.







Divine Intervention

Sometimes in life, the subtlety of miracles truly does show the hand of a benevolent creator behind the tiny and busy details of our lives. This post is about just such a time. Working ridiculously hard so that even lunch is a mere rushed affair of only a handful of minutes, you rush back to the office and as you reach your floor you realise that sushi and latte do not mix. You walk briskly to the gents and almost bump into a gentleman just leaving who smiles and greets you magnanimously. Upon entering the toilets for this floor however, the stench of putrefied faeces hits your nostrils like a sledgehammer. Disoriented, you reel towards the pissoir reflexively as you realise this is only bringing you deeper into the sensation of actually having your head inside the bowels of a co-worker. One with death in his colon apparently. The first spasm of a stomach about to wrench itself from your body hits. You try to hold your breath as your watering eyes

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seek escape. As you rip the door from its hinges trying not to think about the fact that you have some of those molecules on your mouth, you escape.

Only to realise the stirred up sushi-latte now requires urgent expulsion. You rush two floors down. No other toilets. Cramping you go back up then climb one floor. Nothing. And another. Still nothing and you have no more floors to explore! There must be another toilet. Armed with the courage that can

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only come from an imminent ass explosion, you make your way past the front office of a firm of solicitors as if you owned the firm.

You walk down a long corridor at random and

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then turn and… Then you see it. Divine Intervention. God loves you.




USA Begins Biowarfare on Europe?



These days of course, we are all, every one of us, a so-called conspiracy theorist. That term used to mean you were a tin-foil hat wearing crazy who believed UFOs regularly abducted you for possible implantation of the Zeta Reticulan version of a cheap Taiwanese radio somewhere in your flesh. Anal probes were almost demanded rather than expected. And not wearing your tin-foil hat meant you kinda liked it and wanted it to happen more often.

But this was a brief period. Its height was between 1958 and 1963 really. Sometime after 1963 and the Kennedy assassination, anyone who actually used the laws of physics, rational observation, and demonstrable facts to investigate any of the many excesses of government (but particularly US government) became a “conspiracy theorist”. You didn’t “believe” that Oswald was the only lone gunman? Well you must be a Godless communist conspiracy theorist. And so it went. Shadows of the McCarthy hearings still strong on the tail of the 1963 murder of JFK. So here are some interesting facts for you. You may stock up on that tin foil before you begin reading though. Read more »

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we fix/zap/kill the relevant bug/grey/ninja. The contact form is fine though, so if you have any questions please e-mail instead for the next couple of days. This should be sorted soon. In other news, I will be announcing a new book release very soon. A novel this time.

PUA Training

So called Pick-Up-Artists (PUAs) have a very real need to get some training. In reading comprehension. The cartoon above is a subtle hint from me to the various “Captains of America” that perpetuate this sorry state of affairs. Read more »

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