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Government Work


2013-06-12 18.34.34

The Thames footpath along the river near my home has been shut down for what no doubt passes for “health and safety” reasons, but in my opinion should more accurately be renamed Fraud, Laziness and Backhanders.

You will note from the image at the top of the post, taken in mid June, (the 12th to be precise) the DANGER that citizens, in their zombie-like stupidity could be exposed to and big brother government is SAVING LIVES and no doubt THINKING OF THE CHILDREN.

By the way, know that I took that picture with the same sense of civic duty that the government itself has. In other words, since the path had been closed since March, after a good three months, I though it was time to begin documenting this idiocy, with a view to you know, blog about it “sometime soon”. In true Government style, it is now November. The fences are still up, the barriers, as you can see in another shot below are still there. The first day the barriers alone were erected, but the next day the fences were up. Essentially meaning I can’t walk to the station in the morning by the scenic route for the last eight months. Neither can anyone else. Moms, strolling their children, kids playing, all have to detour via the main road, Westferry road, not as pleasant as walking along the river I assure you.


See the Barriers to protect the citizens, citizen. See them and be grateful!

 2013-06-23 14.56.51

Right. So what exactly is the problem? Is the river Thames flooding it’s banks? Have small children and old ladies gone missing due to kidnap by the mudlark-people who must have extensive tunnels under the whole Thames foothpath network?

This. This is what has kept the path closed for 8 months. 8 months and counting.


The entrance to the Hollow Earth


2013-06-23 23.04.02

Now, let me explain citizen that the picture above was also taken in June (the 23rd to be exact). Yes. At risk of life and limb, not to mention kidnapping by mudlark-people, (and/or an imminent arrest by the local constabulary for reporting on the fraudulent and shitty practices of the local council, endangering my own life) I intrepidly took it upon myself to record the danger first-hand. At night-time. Alone. I know, Spetznaz and the Navy Seals should just issue me with honorary badges or something.

So you see the issue. It’s like a hole. It’s a pretty nasty looking hole all-right. 8 months to plug a hole is certainly not enough time. You need to like…err…send a whole team of investigators and seismic…structure…like…specialists, that’s it, specialists! And geologists. And river-water guys, to like, inspect the foundations of…the path, the river, the housing, the very Westferry road that runs parallel. I mean, it could all be INFESTED with mudlark-people. And rat-tunnels. Mudlark-people love them some rat-tunnels. They may even have some swamp-people over for the coming festive season. Swamp-people and mudlark-people might breed. Who knows what that could result in. Muddy evil, child-eating trolls probably. At least.

But fear not, because last night, armed with nothing but foolish courage, I again took another image of the hole. That’s right. I am calling it the hole.

The Hole


Yes. You see it don’t you? It got slightly bigger.

Yeah. Because weathering and rain and 5 fucking months of nothing will do that to exposed soil; kind of wash it away. The hole is pretty deep now. You could fit a person in it. Possibly you could even fit a person the size of the council idiot whose job it is to get this fixed. Or the no doubt-corrupt or criminally incompetent contractor and various associated “experts” and “consultants” they may have on this task. Some of them possibly being ghosts (but still drawing full wages, because ghosts have needs too). I mean I don’t know, this is all supposition and opinion on my part you understand. I don’t have all the fact, or any facts really, apart from you know, the photos I am showing you and the 8 months of nothing and blocked path to go on. Oh yeah, and about 20 years of working in the construction industry and being pretty good at forensic accounting and having been fired, err…asked politely to move on, from at least a couple of firms who were embezzling money left right and center, and having taken one of them to court (cough, Billfinger Berger, cough) and having won, thus clearing my own name from any further corruption and nasty shit they got up to later. But you know, it’s still all just an opinion piece on my part.

The hole is pretty big NOW, mind you. Big enough you might fit the councillor, the contractor, maybe a consultant or two with a bit of squashing and you could pour a concrete step over it and erect a sign as a warning to others of their ilk.

Back in March it looked a bit like a pothole, but let’s give the benefit of the doubt. Let’s say an extensive area of suspect ground is involved, it can’t be THAT bad because there are like you know, buildings a few metres away from the hole. Buildings with foundations and piles driven deep underground due to the proximity of the river and those buildings have people living in them, so again, it can’t be THAT bad. But even if it were, you get a few people, you dig, you open it the fuck up, you dig it all out, you shove down a couple more piles if need be, you concrete the shit out of it and you cover up the whole thing with the same footpath tiles and be done with it.

Total time to do this even if you are a lazy, corrupt official, getting monstrous kickbacks from an equally incompetent, corrupt friend of yours that has a construction company? Say three, four weeks, stretch it to two months and call it a good few thousand pounds in your pocket for doing a shit job in a poor time, but the citizens are used to being robbed blind and you’d probably get a promotion for not letting it run to 8 fucking months and becoming blogged about. But you know, that’s just me trying to imagine the criminal and lazy mind of councillors and corrupt construction companies. I guess I don’t have a very good imagination.

Oh by the way, the whole of Westferry road was resurfaced in the summer. They worked at night, did it in section, a couple of bus stops were closed a couple of days and the whole thing was done in two or three weeks. That’s just to you know…compare stuff.

So I would like to ask the whole government, hell, at this point, I would like to ask David Cameron himself:

Since you got outplayed by Russia and managed at least not to look like Tony Blair did re. Iraq, over Syria, could you take the millions you didn’t have to use to deploy the army to “protect” the gaslines that go through Syria and get a hole in Tower Hamlets sorted out so I can enjoy my walk to work, David? Can you? Pretty please? Cause if you haven’t noticed it’s starting to piss me off.

 PS: Oh yes, and I’m willing to bet money all the barriers and fencing are hired. Incurring weekly hiring costs.




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