You know how listening to most people’s dreams is a total drag? Not so my wife’s.
She usually falls asleep on the couch, pillow on my lap about 3 to 5 minutes after we sit down in the evening to attempt watching something together after the kids are all in bed and the other couple of hundred things are only partially finished.
Actual converstion:
Me (gently stroking her head awake): Babe, you’re whimpering in your sleep and your neck is getting kinked. How about you go up to bed?
Her (whimpers just like the baby daughter when she is calling you softly)
Me (holding back laughter) are you ok? Having a bad dream?
Her: No… I can’t fall asleep… I want to be human!
Me: (laughing) pretty sure you’re not even when awake!
Her: well, I’m not telling you my dream then!
Me: Oh. Was it a good one?
Her: I dreamt of it again
It’s true, she told me this the previous evening
Me: You mean…
Her: Yes. I had Tina Turner’s dog. She left it to me!
Me: (not containing laughter anymore) Why are you even dreaming this?
Her: I don’t know! But obviously there is this dog. There must be. And Tina left it to me.
… his name is Bruce.
Me: Bwahahhahahahahahha…..
Her: Yes! His name is Bruce, I’m pretty sure, same as last night.
Me: …..hahahhahahahha
Her: And he’s got weird eyes.
Me: …hahhah (tearing up from laughter) funny how? Hahhahah
Her: He’s got human eyes! (Meaningful look at me, as if this would be an important reveal of some kind).
Me: (can’t stop laughing)
*After I catch my breath*
Me: give me a kiss…
Her: (shoves cheek at me)
Me: That’s not a kiss, that’s a cheek shove!
Her: hmmm!
I obviously didn’t take Bruce’s plight seriously enough. It was tough, but somehow I managed to get a small kiss before bed. Crisis averted!
At least until Tina’s executor calls us about Bruce anyway. I can only hope he’s being well cared for until then. Him and his human eyes.
Wife dreams
You know how listening to most people’s dreams is a total drag? Not so my wife’s.
She usually falls asleep on the couch, pillow on my lap about 3 to 5 minutes after we sit down in the evening to attempt watching something together after the kids are all in bed and the other couple of hundred things are only partially finished.
Actual converstion:
Me (gently stroking her head awake): Babe, you’re whimpering in your sleep and your neck is getting kinked. How about you go up to bed?
Her (whimpers just like the baby daughter when she is calling you softly)
Me (holding back laughter) are you ok? Having a bad dream?
Her: No… I can’t fall asleep… I want to be human!
Me: (laughing) pretty sure you’re not even when awake!
Her: well, I’m not telling you my dream then!
Me: Oh. Was it a good one?
Her: I dreamt of it again
It’s true, she told me this the previous evening
Me: You mean…
Her: Yes. I had Tina Turner’s dog. She left it to me!
Me: (not containing laughter anymore) Why are you even dreaming this?
Her: I don’t know! But obviously there is this dog. There must be. And Tina left it to me.
… his name is Bruce.
Me: Bwahahhahahahahahha…..
Her: Yes! His name is Bruce, I’m pretty sure, same as last night.
Me: …..hahahhahahahha
Her: And he’s got weird eyes.
Me: …hahhah (tearing up from laughter) funny how? Hahhahah
Her: He’s got human eyes! (Meaningful look at me, as if this would be an important reveal of some kind).
Me: (can’t stop laughing)
*After I catch my breath*
Me: give me a kiss…
Her: (shoves cheek at me)
Me: That’s not a kiss, that’s a cheek shove!
Her: hmmm!
I obviously didn’t take Bruce’s plight seriously enough. It was tough, but somehow I managed to get a small kiss before bed. Crisis averted!
At least until Tina’s executor calls us about Bruce anyway. I can only hope he’s being well cared for until then. Him and his human eyes.
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