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Poor Pietro

I watch and listen, on and off, when I have some spare time, to the videos of Pietro Bisanti, they are in Italian so this will not apply to too many people in terms of those bilingual enough to see them for themselves. But Mr. Bisanti does speak and I am sure reads English quite well, so I will be sending him a link.

A quick summary before I criticise the man, and I think he is intelligent enough to realise that unlike some idiots he recently lambasted (rightly) for being Internet drama queens/grifters and various species of retards, I do so, not with the intent to reduce him in any way, but, since he is a let’s say semi-public persona, being on the internet of his own volition, and dispenses general advice and his opinions of life, the universe and everything, I think it’s fair for me to comment on them when I think he is doing a MASSIVE error and thereby also leading others astray. Fair enough that most who listen to him don’t listen to me and we do so in different languages, but you never know, and in any case, the issue is a global one that I recently addressed with respect to Karl Denninger on this very blog, so, although Bisanti is GenX and not a boomer, he is not going to be immune to a similar beam of light on him, highlighting a more typically Millennial disease, which, however, also afflicts a few GenXers.

Bisanti was an ex-Carabinieri (Italian Military Police) who became Maresciallo (usually the head guy at a station as far as I know) and worked as a Carabiniere for over 20 years. Today he works as a legal consultant and “igenista” which is, at my rough understanding, a guy who preoccupies himself with how different foods and activities and so on affects your health, including mental health, and who looks at health in general. He admits he made several errors over his journey in this field, being a vegan and a fruitarian at different times, which he states were both mistakes. He also suffered the usual “vaccines” for military service, but as far as I know refused all the covid nonsense.

I can’t really comment on his food-related stuff, as I am generally ignorant of it and I also tend to be supremely uninterested in that stuff since I can’t figure out the truth of various statements without doing my own research and I think it would take years of study and testing to know with any precision. Plus, I think each person is a little different, so, in my 54 years on this Earth I figured out what works for me mostly, and I try to stay within certain parameters and as I age I try to be a bit more careful. My personal favourite would be to eat mostly fish and other generally white meat that is healthy and natural with the occasional steak and some salads and some fruit and so on, otherwise I avoid grains and generally that’s about it, but I am not against the odd drink, or even, once in a blue moon, a cigar.

So my commentary has nothing to do with his primary chosen career, in which he gives seminars around Italy.

No, my commentary today comes only as a result of noting over the last year or two, that when Mr. Bisanti talks about women, relationships, marriage and children, his view can essentially be summarised as mostly negative.

Now, unlike a lot of the incels, would-be pagans, and MGTOW chronic masturbators, I don’t think Bisanti has or would have any real issues to get with women for a sexual relationship. He’s confident and fairly level-headed, has a generally healthy approach to reality as far as I can tell (except in this area I am going to gently rake him over the coals for) and I am sure there would be no shortage of female companionship if he actively searched for it. And yet…

Let me first point out, in no specific order, some of the comments he made that are so wrong that it caused me to think to write this post, in the (vain I am sure) hope he maybe takes a step back and reconsiders a few things and thereby also, I sincerely hope, improve his life, as well as perhaps give better general advice on the topic to his many followers. After each point, I will also critique as relevant. This should give a fairly comprehensive perspective of the man and his views, after which I can present my conclusions.

  • He commented on a documentary he says he saw based on some African tribe in Tanzania if memory serves me, where he said the general attitude was that the various adults would all have sex with whomever they fancied that was up for it, and there was no jealousy, possession, and so on, and —in essence— he thought this was a good thing (as well as believed it apparently). In short, a bit of the same concept of “free love” of the 60’s boomers.

Now… having lived in Africa for some 25 years, I can say that on hearing this comment of his I actually burst out laughing. Because I would bet you any amount of money that this fantasy place and tribe, is a pure myth invented by the producers of the ridiculous documentary. That is not to say that there aren’t rides or people in Africa that copulate with each other more or less with the same kind of abandon than a troop of bonobos. In fact, generally, in Africa this is not uncommon. But if you think that all the consequent jealousies, bitterness, and yes, assaults, violence and murder don’t go hand in hand with such practices, well, then, like our Mr. Bisanti, I can summarise your view as: “Tell me you have never been to Africa and don’t know a damned thing about it or its people, without telling me…” And yes I know Africa is vast and has many people and many tribes of Africans on it. And my statement remains unchanged. But to give you a perspective, think of the average hippie commune, be it in Europe or America, where it was Caucasians that tried this sort of “free love” experiment and then look at the results. It’s much the same. With quite a lot less murder, generally speaking, but really in no way a recipe for happiness.

  • On the video I saw today he said that if you live with a woman she:
    • Dictates the rules
    • Uses up all your time
    • Doesn’t let you pursue your interests
    • In general that basically a relationship or a marriage is a miserable way of living

Now, we all have our trauma, I am sure, and I am the first to admit that as a general rule the average Italian woman, compared to other nationalities I am familiar with, are more of a clingy, whiny, pain in the ass, but as always, that is a generalisation. And there are Italian women too that are far from it, as always, you gotta know what you want and what you’re getting into. But in all the relationships I had no woman ever “used up all my time” and sure as death and taxes, no woman I lived with “made all the rules”. Mostly because the very idea is absurd as far as I am concerned. The only “rules” any adult normal person should need are the basic ones of civilised behaviour towards each other and then whatever quirks you may have you need to adjust for each other. As for any woman not letting me pursue my interests, again, I am wondering what kind of women the man got with, or maybe I am wrong and he is a kind of incel. I just can’t fathom it.

I pursued things I wanted to do without that even ever being an issue. I trained in martial arts most of my life and pursued plenty of other things, I wrote books, scuba dived, learn and practiced hypnosis, travelled a whole bunch, enjoyed target shooting, hunting, and probably a dozen other things I was interested in and did for some time that I am just not even remembering right now. And while relationships that go wrong can be the source of the worst pain you may ever feel (yes, I am a survivor, please donate generously) they also represent the source of the best joy one can ever feel too. The fact that Bisanti seems to think the negatives outweigh the positives, does give me several clues about him and/or his life.

  • Children are NOT the source of joy. In fact he categorically stated that in the main, children are not a source of happiness.

Here I need to take a little pause to try to understand if the man even has the same definition I have for happiness, or if he has the same one that 19 year old bubble-heads on tik-tok have for it. So let me explain my definition. Happiness was one of those words that I asked myself if I knew what it was and remained mute to myself. Quite a bit like love. For a long time, I would think: “Am I happy?” And not really know how to answer that. Similarly, I’d meet or be with a girl, that I found interesting, or attractive, or sexy, and I’d ask myself “Is this love?” And again remain mute to the reply. I didn’t know.

Perhaps my own level of self-awareness is well beyond that of normal people, it’s possible, but I recall the very first time I realised what happiness was. I was 26 and driving a beat up old VW Golf and wherever I was headed I was contemplating this sensation that I had achieved a couple of times when doing karate kata repeatedly and non-stop, to the point that I could barely lift my arms and legs anymore, then, breaking through the exhaustion barrier, I got a sensation like a kind of light inside my head and then I could carry on a lot longer and nothing felt heavy anymore. It was like being a little in a dream but fully focussed and calm and the movements just came naturally. I knew about breaking through that wall of resistance from swimming years earlier, but the experience when doing kata was markedly different. In swimming I would just become like a kind of human robot, just moving, moving, moving, tumble, twist, turn, push off, moving, moving and so on, length after length of the pool. But this brightness, this kind of light in the middle of my head, felt different and it was while driving in my beat up blue and white VW that I realised “Oh! that’s what happiness is!” Finally I knew this word. And that is what I think objective happiness is like. It is a kind of unexpected consequence of something you do, you need to do, you want to do, you should do, you must do, duty means you do it, desire means you do it, all of the above. And eventually, if you do it well enough and deep enough, and hard enough, you get this pervasive sensation of happiness.

Yes, yes, I realise how sexual the above description sounds, and many women in my past no doubt recognise the issue. You’re all welcome.

But seriously, the point is that happiness is not about you getting everything you want on a silver platter with no effort. That’s not happiness. Nor is it the whine of the tik-tokker that wants the white knight with a Ferrari and the millions who is sensitive but also takes charge and who loves hearing her talk about the mindless minutia of her day.

Conclusions

In short, Mr. Bisanti probably has a somewhat limited perspective on the women of the world, being mostly familiar with Italian ones. Perhaps his specific brand of personality attracts especially clingy and/or “we must be serious about the relationship by doing x y and z” types (something I suspect, as he tends to be a pretty intense and decisive guy, so maybe a woman naturally thinks she should be too, so as to keep up with him, when usually, the opposite is more true).

Perhaps he’s just had a run of bad luck in his relationships. And undoubtedly, he also has bought into the boomer rhetoric of “free love”, which I understand, I had a somewhat similar approach to sex and women for some years after I decided that obviously I wasn’t cut out for long term relationships since the two major ones I had had had failed and the next two did too in a much shorter time period. After that, as soon as a woman irritated me I nexted her, and I did that for a long while. But then I realised that way of living was really ultimately quite unsatisfying. Perhaps Bisanti hasn’t quite reached that point yet, even though he is 48. On the other hand, all the Boomer nonsense people of his and my generation were marinated in, does tend to retard the process of realising certain things, especially about relationships.

He mentions however that he is the third of 11 children. Which mystifies me even more with his view of children. And says that at his mother’s house he never feels harassed, people talk if they want to, don’t if they don’t want to and everyone is chilled. Well, why should it be any different in your own house with a woman you choose to be with?

Maybe he just hasn’t found the right one? But I doubt it. I think that despite Mr. Bisanti being moderately intelligent and decently in touch with reality as it is, including on many aspects that it is quite hard for many people to realise, never mind speak openly about, be it the covid lies, immigration, crime and justice and so on, the man has been embittered.

I think he has let whatever negative crap he saw or sees daily affect him in a terribly sad way. And this is almost certainly the result of Mr. Bisanti being a reasonable man.

Luckily I was never afflicted by this pernicious issue of being a reasonable man. As I think Mark Twain said (I may be wrong), reasonable men see the world as it is and adapt to it. Unreasonable men see the world as it is and unreasonably expect it to adapt to them. So all human progress, is the result of unreasonable men. Which, in essence, is basically true. Sadly, most unreasonable men are also usually neuroatypical, and we polite, mild-mannered, Aspergers types are heavily outnumbered by the psychotic narcissists. But there it is.

And sure, life can always throw you absolutely unexpected and vile curve-balls; but buddy, Pietro, if you expect anything of worth to just stumble into your lap and “make you happy” you seriously have it wrong.

And if you expect your children to be a constant source of joyous entertainment, again, you are probably prancing in meadows looking for fucking unicorns too, but that’s not the point. Because even when at 3 am, covered in baby projectile vomit, all in your bed, and a leaky diarrhoea-filled nappy is dribbling all over you as you try to get the little bundle of screaming snot to a dry spot to clean him off, when you look into the face of that little dude with snot-running down his face, hiccuping and tear-filled, you can only feel love and the sensation that you wish you had all his troubles so he’d feel better. And buddy, no amount of tik-tok “happiness” or dozens of nymphomaniac sluts with model looks trying to drain you dry even begins to compare.

And that’s the bad days. The good days are truly awesome. You’re basically watching a sacred soul grow and learn and evolve in this world and you somehow had a part in making that happen and you will continue to do so until you drop dead yourself. And if I have any say in it, you’ll still look over them even after your body here has rotted away to dust.

You’re thinking too small Pietro.

You’re missing out on what really matters.

You’ve been afflicted by the Italian sadness. A thing I noted even as a teenager when I came here on holiday. Oppressed and squished economically and mentally and in so many other ways, the mind, the intellect, the imagination, the soul, of the average Italian was so limited. So incapable of imagining bigger and better things and then doing insane stuff to make them happen. Mind you it is not limited to Italy, I recall at age 16 when I was new in the UK and at school I asked one of the guys there what his life dreams were, the reply I got was:

Oh I’d like to just get married, and have like… two cars, a couple of kids, a nice house…

I looked at him incredulously and said:

“Man, that’s what happens if you just sit on your ass and do nothing. Don’t you want to sail the world in a 70 foot trimaran with an all female crew? Drive a Ferrari, something?!”

I’ve never forgotten his reply, and to this day it sends shiver of mediocrity down my spine: “Oh,” he said, “that only happens in the movies.”

I replied:”For you, with that attitude, that’s definitely the case.”

Now, as it happens I have not sailed the world in a 70 foot trimaran with an all female crew. Mostly because to get that trimaran is a lot of really hard work, and so is sailing really, and it really was much easier to experience the all-female crew on dry land one at a time (well, not at the same time anyway), and travel the world by aeroplane. And I did a bunch of other stuff and saw and experienced things that even most super-rich people who never have to work haven’t seen or experienced, and certainly not the way I did.

Sure, my life has had extremely deep pits of pain and heartache, but so what? I have experienced peaks of ecstasy, human intimacy, and love that few men get to experience in their life. I don’t really regret any of it. A life well-lived is indeed, and adventure. And you know what they say about adventures: They make great stories after you’ve survived them.

If you survive them.

So, my sincere wish for Mr. Bisanti, and all those like him, is to shake your fossilised little heart and brains up. Consider why you have such a dismal view of relationships. I am certain I have been through far worse heartache as a result of women than Mr. Bisanti ever has, or is likely to, and yet I never felt as negative and downcast about the concept of living with one woman for the rest of my days, and making children with her, as poor Pietro is.

In the last video I saw, here, about 7 minutes in, he states that those people who would criticise him and try to present their marriage as blissful paradise are liars, who might even lie to others or themselves, but can’t fool him.

Well, man, you’re just plain wrong. No marriage is all bliss and tik-tok “happiness”. None. Also, you can’t find any Unicorns or Pegasi. I know, the Pegasi thing especially is a cruel lie, but then I think it comes from Islam, so what do you expect. But I guarantee you man, some marriages absolutely can be like karate kata happiness. If you work hard enough and pour sweat and tears and blood out of you enough and you picked the right one, nothing compares. Really. Nothing does.

I wish you a better view of things Mr. Bisanti.

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